


The Good Girl

by roseannedarcy



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Eventual Smut, F/M, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-06
Updated: 2017-01-07
Packaged: 2018-09-15 09:00:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,465
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9227951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roseannedarcy/pseuds/roseannedarcy
Summary: "Clarke thinks the universe is playing one big joke on her. Well, multiple, actually. One after another.It starts in spring, and after that, everything goes wrong."Modern AU. Clarke gets pregnant from a one-night stand.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This will have two or three chapters. Hope you guys enjoy!

Clarke thinks that universe is playing one big joke on her. Well, multiple, actually. One after another. 

It starts in spring and after that, everything goes wrong.

Early March, her father goes to jail, and her mother was the one who turned him in. And as much as Clarke likes to think she is a law-abiding citizen, there’s nothing she wouldn’t do for her dad. Even cover for him if he was a murderer. She doesn’t stop herself from calling her mother a traitor, accusing her of thinking only of herself and ruining their family, and then she slams the front door and decides she is not coming home for spring break. Thankfully, she has her sorority house always open for her.

She had been preparing to tell her mother that she doesn’t want to do medicine, that she actually wants to be a teacher. She knows she has the potential to be a doctor, but she understands she won’t be able to detach herself from patients. Her compassion is ridiculous - just knowing that someone is in pain makes her heart ache and she feels dizzy, and she simply can’t get over it. 

So she’s decided she wants to do something that is meaningful too, but not as emotionally demanding. She wants to be an elementary school teacher. She’s great with kids and she had considered this even when she herself was a kid. For her, it’s settled. 

Clarke had been preparing to break the news to her mom, but now, having cut off all communication with her, she has no one to break them to. No one will tell her that she’s making a huge mistake that she will inevitably regret. And, with her dad being in prison, there is no one to stand up to her in an argument. A family argument. 

As much as she hates to admit it, she misses her family. As dysfunctional as it’s always been. And she also misses her mother.

There’s no one to talk to, not like that. No one to really argue with. She has friends, of course. There’s her sorority sister Octavia, with Jasper and Monty being part of the package (O had known them since virtually forever), and there’s Raven who had transferred a month ago to restore the complicated relationship that she had with her long-time mysterious boyfriend that no one’s gotten to meet yet. (Not that she’s been thinking about that a lot lately, given the circumstances.) She’s known Raven for a week, but could literally swear they’re soulmates. No one understands her like she does. 

Still, she can’t talk to Wells that often anymore: he’s preoccupied with constant search of internships (no one seems to take those as seriously as Wells does). 

She misses her family so much it makes her feel physically sick.  So, Octavia suggests they get drunk. And Clarke is always up for that.

It’s only been half an hour since they’ve arrived at the bar, but Clarke is already tipsy. Or maybe worse than that, but that’s what she tells herself. 

“Seriously, what is my life now?” she mumbles, tired and drunk, resting her chin on her palm. “I’m a senior, about to graduate, I have no loving relationship, no family left—” 

“You have us,” Octavia says, squeezing her other hand, and Monty and Jasper nod in agreement. “Always remember that.”

“I know that, and I love you guys, but sometimes…”

“That’s not enough?” Octavia finishes.

“No, sometimes it’s not. Please don’t hate me.”

Jasper snorts. “We wouldn’t hate you. I completely understand you, actually. That’s how I felt when Maya left me. That I needed someone who really got how I felt in that situation to talk to me, and even friends’ support wasn’t enough for me.”

Clarke remembers. It was their sophomore year, and Maya, being older, had to move across the continent to pursue a career of her dreams after graduation. She was the one who suggested she and Jasper break up. Jasper agreed: he didn’t want to hold her back and stop her from making her dream come true. He said he was willing to let her go, if that was what she wanted. So she left, and Jasper spent around three months drinking his life away, until his parents (quite cleverly summoned by Octavia) showed up and basically forced him to go through therapy. He is better now, but when someone mentions Maya he always gets that look in his eyes that never used to leave him right after their breakup. That’s why his words surprise Clarke, and warm feeling of affection grows somewhere deep in her chest. 

Her friends love her very much, and she should be grateful she has them.

"Thank you guys," Clarke says, throwing her arms around Octavia and Jasper's shoulders (since she is sitting between them) and hugging them both. "I love you. I just wish Raven was here too."

"Well, she's a little busy working on her relationship," O retorts, parodying Raven's voice for emphasis. Clarke chuckles. Raven and Octavia aren't on good terms, and that's something she can't understand, but hasn't given up trying to fix yet. Octavia's phone buzzes, and she picks it up to read the text she received. "Speaking of relationships. Would you hate me forever--"

"If Lincoln needs you, you can go," Clarke says with a smile. Those two are just too cute and she can't stay in bad mood for too long when the conversation brushes upon the topic of their relationship. She has no idea how O managed to find a boyfriend who has the looks of a model and a benevolent, caring personality. Oh, and who also absolutely worships the ground Octavia walks on. 

"You're an angel, and I'm a shitty friend and totally owe you," Octavia states, sliding closer to plant a lipgloss-y kiss on Clarke's cheek. "Bye."

Clarke looks at Monty and Jasper, who seem very tired. "Do you want to go?" She asks so that they don't have to do it. 

They nod and start to head off, but when they're about to take their bus, Clarke remembers she forgot her purse on the table. Her phone, her money, her whole life is in that purse. 

She tells the guys to leave without her, assuring them she's not really drunk and she'll just call a taxi right after she gets her purse, and jumps off the bus. 

It leaves without her. 

She finds her purse, and on her way out she bumps into a cute guy, who seems to be struggling to stay sober that Thursday evening too. He spills his beer all over her shirt and offers to let him borrow one of his since he doesn't live far. He says his name is Finn and he's the first nightstand Clarke has in her life. 

Clarke wakes up around five in the morning and sees Finn's phone that he left on the nightstand by his bed. She feels terrible at first, but when she sees notifications of texts from Raven Reyes, her blood runs cold. 

She screwed her friend's on and off boyfriend. She will burn in hell for this. 

Terrified and feeling like shit, Clarke gathers her stuff and goes home, trying not to wake Octavia as she crawls into bed and quietly cries into the pillow. 

Clarke spends the next two weeks trying to come up with a way to tell Raven about what happened. But she can't find a right moment. 

By the time she convinces herself that there simply isn't a right moment to tell your friend that you're a cunning bitch who slept with her boyfriend, Raven calls her and cries over the phone. She say her boyfriend has been in a car accident, and that he's dead. Clarke tells herself that she isn't relieved by the news. After all, she might be a bitch, but she's not that big of a bitch. She consoles her friend in any possible ways. 

And two weeks after that, Clarke finds out she's pregnant. 

Mid-May, they all graduate from college, and it's been a week since Clarke found out she is pregnant. At a celebration party at one of the frat houses, Clarke can't bring herself to feel happy. Once again, her future is one big blur that terrifies her. She has no job, no partner to support her, and no family (apart from her friends). She still doesn't know how to tell her parents that their daughter, ten minutes out of college, has managed to get pregnant. She is not in mood for partying, and honestly, if Octavia hadn't insisted, she would not have even gone. Octavia was also the one who forced her to wear a low-cut top, since she didn't want to get too dressed up. 

It appears Octavia invited her brother, Bellamy, to this party, even though he's a long time graduate. She notices him and gives him a polite smile, which he probably takes as a sign that she wouldn't mind talking. So he comes up to talk, and Clarke regrets smiling at him immediately. Not that she hates or dislikes Bellamy, she just really doesn't like him. He's way too clever for his own good, too hot, and opinionated. Basically, everything she would've liked about a guy, had there been any chance that he'd actually pay any attention to her and see past the fact that she was his baby sister's best friend. But there's no chance because why would he? She's been Octavia's friend for good four years now, and that sort of ensured her screwing up in front of him on multiple occasions. Like when Clarke got so drunk she couldn't walk one time her freshman year, and Octavia got scared and called Bellamy, who had to almost carry her into her dorm room. Or that time when Clarke accidentally ripped her dress and, having called Octavia for help, had to hide in the bathroom for about an hour before Bellamy barged in (despite it being a female bathroom) and said that Octavia couldn't come so she had asked him to drop off a substitute dress for Clarke. Basically, every incident that is cringe-worthy and that haunts Clarke every time she can't fall asleep at night Bellamy had been present for. He even held her hair as she puked into the toilet after having had too many tequilas. 

Considering all that, one might have suggested that Bellamy had a thing for her or something at least vaguely similar, but there is nothing. He has this weird attachment to her, but it’s like he is her older brother. Like she is just another baby sister for him that Octavia has always been. And she knows it's hard but possible to get out of friend zone, but it's literally impossible to leave sister zone. She doesn't stand a chance and that annoys her to no end. 

That's why every time she sees Bellamy she makes a point of rolling her eyes and huffing at everything he says. She does the same now, and at the thought that her zero chances of ever getting him to like her have become absolutely negative, since she is now pregnant with another guy's baby, her heart clenches. And no one knows about it. She knows it's only been a week since she found out, and she hasn't even seen a doctor, but she feels like the weight of the secret is about to crush her and she honestly just wants to tell someone. But it can't be Bellamy. It simply can't.

"How are you, Princess?" Bellamy asks, all charming smiles and cute freckles, and Clarke feels like her heart is about to explode in her chest. But not in a good way. Not good at all. 

"I'm good," she pushes out of herself, and holding the cup with orange juice in it. If she didn't have a drink in her hand, people would start asking question, or worse, forcing her to drink something, so she thought she would pretend she was doing it already.

"Not enjoying the party?" 

Clarke sees Octavia watching them from across the room. She's been talking to Lincoln, but now she got distracted, and she watches Clarke's face with a concerned frown, like she's about to figure something out. Clarke genuinely hopes she doesn't. She opens her mouth to respond, but then Scream & Shout by Will I Am starts to play, and the song brings memories of her freshman year, when the song was extremely popular. She remembers how easy everything was back then; her parents were happy together, her father wasn't in prison, and her mother wasn't partly responsible for it. She wasn't pregnant. She had her whole life and a bright future ahead of her.

She never answers Bellamy's question because there's suddenly this empty feeling in her stomach and tears start to run down her face, and soon she's basically sobbing. She doesn't see Octavia make her way towards her, only feels her hug in a few moments, and "What have you done?" O barks at Bellamy, as if it's his fault Clarke is crying. 

"Nothing!" he said, eyes open wide and confusion written all over his face. Octavia gives him a judgmental look, clearly not believing, so he raises his hands, "I swear". Clarke notices this, but keeps sobbing into O's shoulder, until her friend gently pulls her into the corridor, saying that she should get some fresh air.

It's quiet outside, and Clarke can actually hear herself think, but she still can't stop crying, even though she understands that it's actually ridiculous. Octavia shouldn't have to pick up the pieces of her when it's clearly her own fault. She's just so tired. She doesn't know how to hold it inside anymore, so she continues crying, with Octavia hugging her and caressing her back and murmuring that it's all fine, that she'll be fine. 

A few minutes later, when it feels like she's physically run out of tears, Clarke untangles herself out of Octavia's embrace and tries to wipe tears off her face. Unsuccessfully. 

"Whatever Bell said or did," Octavia says, looking in Clarke's eyes with all seriousness, "I'll crush his balls. And then he'll come and apologise."

Clarke sighs, smiling lightly in spite of herself. "Bellamy didn't do anything, O. I wasn't crying because of him."

"Then what happened? You haven't been yourself for the last week, but I thought you'd tell me when you were ready."

Clarke looks at her with surprise, but Octavia gives her a pointed look. "You're not that good of an actress, Clarke. What happened?"

She doesn't know whether she should tell. Having anyone know seems like the scariest thing in the world right now. But she can't do this alone anymore. She's tired. Besides, if she were to tell someone, the first person would be Octavia. They've been there for each other since forever. 

Clarke takes a deep breath. "I'm pregnant."

There's a pause. The silence is so heavy, with Octavia looking at Clarke without blinking, her mouth open in surprise, that Clarke starts to feel anxious. And it's not good.

"Um," Octavia finally says, "Uh- For how long?"

"Around six weeks. I'm not sure though. I haven't been to a doctor."

"And what? Are you going to keep it?"

"I don't know for sure yet, but I don't think abortion is an option for me."

Octavia sighs and covers her eyes with her hands. Clarke feels like she wants to cry again. "I know it seems bad, but it's actually even worse. 

Octavia opens her eyes. "Why?"

"The father of the baby-" she pauses, scared of her friend's reaction. "He's Finn Collins"

"Finn Collins? As in Raven's boyfriend Finn Collins, who died a week ago?"

Clarke nods in response. 

"Shit," O says. "Shit. Does Raven know?" Clarke shakes her head, tears brimming in her eyes again. "Does anyone know?" She shakes her head again. "How did that happen at all?"

Clarke tries to pull herself together to explain herself. "I met him at a bar, I was drunk, had no idea who he was. He didn't tell me he wasn't single. I found out in the morning and ran away. I wanted to tell Raven, I really did, but then-"

"He died." 

"Yes," Clarke sobs. "And now my life is going down the drain, and I have no idea what to do."

Octavia's gaze softens, and she hugs Clarke again, rubbing her back soothingly. "It's going to be fine. We'll figure something out, I promise. Everything will be good."

Clarke just hopes she can believe that one day.

Octavia offers they go home, but Clarke honestly doesn't want to. This party might not be the best idea right now, but at least it's distraction. They return to the room they were in before, but this time Octavia doesn't leave Clarke's side for a while. It feels strange, like her friend is being protective of her now that she knows she's pregnant. Even more protective than she was before. That makes Clarke smile, but the heavy feeling in her stomach hasn't disappeared yet.

Octavia makes a point of not apologising to Bellamy for her outburst earlier, and Bellamy gives Clarke a hug immediately after he sees her. Clarke freezes in surprise, but then relaxes and returns the hug. It's nice. He feels soft and strong at the same time, and also warm and gentle. She likes being hugged by him. They part, and Clarke notices Octavia looking at them with a weirdly smug expression.

Bellamy smiles at Clarke. "Are you okay?"

Octavia responds for her, "Don't worry, she's just-" Clarke gives her a panicked look, silently begging not to tell, "-having a bad day. Graduating from college is a big change." 

Clarke smiles back at Bellamy. "Yeah. I miss how things were before," and it's true. Just not all of the information.

"Hey Bell, could you stay with Clarke while I go look for Lincoln?" O says.

"I don't need a-"

"Sure," Bellamy interrupts Clarke, and his sister heads off to find her boyfriend.

They talk, and it's nice. Snapping at each other and arguing seems to be their specialty, but now they're civil. It seems like Bellamy doesn't want to be hard on Clarke, and despite her pride that hates when others feel sorry for her, she feels grateful. Octavia doesn't come back in the next twenty minutes, and Clarke really needs the bathroom. At least that's what she tells Bellamy, when in reality, she feels really sick, and when Bellamy sees something is wrong and follows her into the bathroom, she realises this is something she isn't prepared for. Everyone else (from what she's heard) throws up in the mornings, whereas with her it's progressively getting worse. If she's going to start throwing up randomly throughout the day, it's going to be hard to hide it from people. Not that it's something that can be hidden forever anyway.

She knows that her position isn't necessarily critical, that things could've been a lot worse. Like when girls get pregnant in high school and can't even go to college because of that. She's graduated, she will be able to find a job- eventually. She's not a kid anymore. But she's still scared, and the fear gets stronger as she keeps throwing up into the toilet, with Bellamy holding her hair for her. If she wasn't about to cry (again), she would've made a joke about déjà vu.

When she's done, she gets up, tears in her eyes, and rinses her mouth and face with lukewarm water. She stands there, her hands on the sink, not knowing how to face Bellamy. If he hasn't guessed it by now, he probably will soon. And now, Clarke suddenly feels ashamed. She doesn't know what he'll think of her when he realises she's pregnant with her friend's boyfriend's child.

"Something's wrong with you, right?" he asks, quiet, sensing that she's not too willing to discuss this with him. Discuss it with anyone, actually. Clarke just prays he doesn’t guess. One single day can't be that eventful, right? If that's the right word.

Clarke straightens up and, swallowing her tears, calms her face. She then turns to Bellamy, trying to look serene and- well, normal. Things being normal is what she wants right now. More than anything. "I'm fine. Must have had too much to drink."

Bellamy frowns. "You haven't had any alcohol tonight. I saw it, you only had one cup in your hand, and I'm pretty sure it was orange juice."

Oh my God, why is he such a stalker, Clarke thinks to herself. But then feels guilty since Bellamy notices those things only because he actually cares. She should appreciate that. And she does. She loves him for it; has for a long time. He's a kind and caring person, who takes his responsibilities seriously, and that's one of the reasons why she fell for him in the first place. And he's looking at her with a gentle expression, but there's also worry in his eyes, so Clarke sighs.

"Then it must be stress or something."

He obviously doesn't buy it, but Clarke doesn't know what else to do. She goes to open the door to leave the bathroom, brushing his shoulder as she walks past, but he grabs her hand right before she is about to leave.

"Seriously, Clarke, what's happening?"

Suddenly, everything inside her explodes. "I'm pregnant, okay?" she says, probably louder than she should. Bellamy freezes, and there's a weird expression on his face, but Clarke doesn't really get to concentrate on that because at that moment, Octavia shows up outside the open door, definitely having heard Clarke's last words. "Happy?" Clarke asks Bellamy, her voice harsh and full of sarcasm, then yanks her hand out of his grip and storms past Octavia, heading for the door.

Octavia follows her, of course, shouting "Clarke, wait!" as she tries to catch up with her.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is the last chapter. Hope you guys enjoy, and I loved writing this story, hence why I'm posting this so quickly. Also, I'm very much not a smut kind of person. As in, I don't mind reading it but writing it is hard, it's difficult not to make it stereotypical or cringe-worthy. So tell me what you think, I hope it's not too bad :)

Clarke's lost count of how many times Bellamy tried to apologise after that night. He calls her, he texts her, and eventually comes over to the house, seeing her packing up her whole life in the sorority house. Octavia is there too, but the siblings share a look, and without a word, Octavia put down the t-shirt she was folding and leaves the room to give them privacy. She shuts the door after herself.

Clarke rolls her eyes at that. She can swear those two are the weirdest siblings in the world. It's like they understand each other through some sort of telepathy, no words needed. She doesn't say anything either, just keeps folding her clothes and arranging them in piles that will later go into suitcases. With her peripheral vision, she sees Bellamy look around, rubbing the back of his head awkwardly, but she keeps doing her thing.

"Hey," he says finally. 

"Hi," Clarke responds, but doesn't look him.

"You didn't return my calls," he says, without any accusation, merely stating the fact. Which Clarke doesn't understand. She knows perfectly well that she's been ignoring him for the last few days. "Or texts." Clarke stays quiet, but now mainly because she doesn't know what to say. She didn't want to talk to him since that night, but not because she hated him. She could never hate Bellamy, she can't even stay mad at him for a long time. It's just that she didn't know _how_ to talk to him after that. After he found out he was pregnant. She sighs, and Bellamy asks, "Are you okay?"

Clarke finally turns to look at him. "Yeah, I'm fine."

"I'm so sorry, Clarke," he says, and the expression on his face is so genuine that her heart skips a beat.

"About what? Me being pregnant? Or about the fact that the baby's father is dead? And also, that it was one of my best friend's boyfriend. What exactly are you sorry about, Bellamy?" she doesn't know why she's saying things like this. All this sass and sarcasm is not her. She and Bellamy used to bicker, argue even, but it never got _cruel_.

"No, for forcing you to tell me. It wasn't my place to demand from you to tell me," he says, sweet and honest, and Clarke melts once again. 

She sighs and pats the space on the bed next to her. Bellamy sits down, and they're quite close, but it's not like this is the first time. It's not like he is affected by this too. He literally only sees a little sister in her. A troubled little sister now. And Clarke used to be the good girl. The one who always got good grades and made her parents proud. She guesses that time ended, and she's not that person anymore. She better start getting used to it.

"I'm not even mad at you anymore," she admits in a quiet voice. "It's just that you were in a wrong place at a wrong time," Clarke pauses, thinking through what she's going to say. "I've been feeling quite… desperate lately. Like my whole world crumbled down, and there's nothing I can do to stop that. And then this pregnancy. You kind of caught me off guard, and I exploded."

He nods, "I completely understand. And when you feel emotional and want to shout at someone, I'll happily take on that role. I'll listen. Just know that you always have me, okay?"

"Okay," she says and smiles at him, and this time it comes easily, not forced in any way. She feels safe with him and she likes the feeling. The last thing she's been feeling lately was safety.

"Have you told Raven yet?" he asks, slightly anxious, maybe feeling he doesn't have a right to expect her to discuss these things with him. But if not him or Octavia, then who?

"I have," Clarke says and starts folding another pair of jeans, just to occupy herself with something. She can constantly feel the heat coming off Bellamy's body, and it's quite distracting. "She's not answering my calls and blocked me everywhere."

Bellamy is silent for a few moments, but then he says, "She might come round."

"I doubt that," Clarke says with a sad smile and then turns to look at him. She feels like crying again (she's been doing that a lot recently), but she doesn't want to do that. She can be stronger. Especially when Bellamy is here. With him and Octavia at her side, she feels like she's capable of anything. Too bad that soon they won't be there to support her.

"Clarke-" Bellamy starts to say, but she suddenly feels a very familiar rise in her stomach, and so she covers her mouth with her hand and _runs_ for the bathroom. A few seconds later, she's throwing up in the toilet, and Bellamy's holding her hair. Again. The fact that he has to see her in moments so gross and definitely unattractive makes her feel desperate. And she doesn't know what to do because it's not like she can just stop puking every few hours. She should definitely start putting her hair up, otherwise she'll need Bellamy all the time.

Having finished, she rises and flushes the toilet. "Sorry you had to see that again," she says, looking up at him sheepishly from under her eyelashes. "Not the best sight," she tries to joke, but Bellamy's expression remains serious.

"You'll always have me," he repeats. "Even when you're gross."

At that, she giggles and he gives her one of his charming smiles. She doesn't understand how he can always be attractive and hot and charming, when she's just been puking, and definitely looks less that presentable.

Someone knocks on the bathroom door, and it's Octavia. She wants to know if Clarke is okay, and after Clarke says everything is fine, both she and Octavia return to packing in their room. Everyone in their sorority now knows that she's pregnant, and not a single person judged her for it. Clarke should probably feel lucky for having such great friends, but right now all she can think about is that she betrayed a great person and a close friend. Raven will probably never forgive her, and rightly so.

"So," Bellamy says, when everyone is the process of packing up their stuff again, "Octavia and I wanted to ask you something."

O sets down a pair of flats she was about to pack up and turns to face Clarke, worry mixed with excitement showing on her face. For a second, Bellamy and Octavia exchange looks silently, and Octavia rolls her eyes.

"You said you don't want to go back home because you're not talking to your mom, right?" She asks, and Clarke nods in agreement. She has no idea where this is going. "And she doesn't even know you're pregnant, and I doubt she'd go easy on you if she found out, no offence," O says.

"I'll have to tell her eventually. That's not something I can hide," Clarke says, and both Blakes nod encouragingly.

"Of course, but Bell and I just thought that maybe you'd want to move in with us for a while?" Octavia asks, and before Clarke can protest, she says, "Hear me out before you refuse, okay?" Clarke sighs. "What are you going to do if you don't want to go home? Where are you going to live?"

Clarke frowns. "Well I was thinking I'll stay with my mom until I can find some place for myself and for the baby."

"And what about money? You won't be able to start a career for a while," Octavia retorts, quite reasonable.

"I have my grandparents' trust fund, so I can use some of that."

"But you said you didn’t want to spend that money," Bellamy objects.

Clarke is silent for a moment. "So what, you're just going to adopt me until I can start teaching?" she can't help but sound defensive. She's proud.

"No, we can't really-" she looks at Bellamy for a second, "-we can't afford to feed you and the baby, but we won't charge you rent. The house is ours. It's not as beautiful as your parents' place, but it's decent. You don't have to do this alone if you have us, Clarke. And you said yourself that you want to stay in the area, so living with the locals is a perfect opportunity. We want to help you through this difficult time, Clarke. Can you let us, please? At least until it gets easier and you start the career you want to have."

She suddenly thinks that, despite rushing for a sorority was her mother's idea because that's something _good girls do_ , it might have actually been a good idea. She found friends for life, such as Octavia and everyone who comes with her in a bundle.

Clarke looked at her nails, trying to stay calm and not to cry again. It seems like everything makes her want to cry lately. She doesn't know what she ever did to deserve people like this to be her friends. They love her and want to help, genuinely concerned about her and her baby's well-being. When she looks up, a smile on her face, Octavia and Bellamy smile too. They know she's convinced.

Early June, she moves into the Blakes' house. Octavia found a job at a bank and is at work five days a week, but Bellamy is a high school teacher, so it's mostly just him and Clarke at home together, and it's nice. Bellamy obviously cares about her, always patient with her frequent emotional outbursts (even though he's never been patient with her before she was pregnant, or maybe he was but Clarke never noticed), and very understanding of her condition. He says he has some idea of how to deal with pregnant women because he was seven when Octavia was born, so he can remember most things his mother went through with her pregnancy. And he's lovely. He makes Clarke her favourite french toast whenever he wants to cheer her up, and he carries her to her bedroom whenever she accidentally falls asleep on the sofa, which happens a lot because she feels exhausted all the time. (But google says that's normal in first trimester.) And sometimes, she wakes up when she feels him carrying her up the stairs, but she pretends to be asleep just so that she doesn't ruin moments that are perfect like that. More than anything, she wants to ask him to stay with her, to hug her and hold her while she sleeps, but she knows she has no right or - more importantly - reason to ask him something like that. So she keeps quiet as her heart speeds up whenever he lifts her up in the air.

She finds a job at a local coffee shop. It doesn't bring a lot of money, and she doesn't have that many working hours, but it's better than doing nothing at all. Clarke thinks she would get bored to death if she didn't do anything with her life.

Clarke also tells her mother about her pregnancy. Her reaction is predictable - she's furious, and she tries to talk Clarke out of keeping the baby, while there's time. She says that she doesn't need to pause her life for this, that she's so young and she'll have plenty of time to have kids. Clarke listens absent-mindedly, knowing that she doesn't want to even consider the things her mother is saying. And after she tells her mother that, they stop talking once again. Clarke spends the evening crying into Bellamy's shoulder, sobbing and saying, _how can she not understand_ and that she has _no one_. Bellamy says she has him and Octavia, that she can count on them, always. He's been saying that a lot lately, sometimes emphasising that she has _him_ , without adding his sister to it, and that always makes her heart skip a beat, but she never lets herself believe that it's something more than fraternal care.

But something happens that makes her living with Bellamy virtually impossible. It's the time for her first ultrasound, and Bellamy insists he will come with her. "I know you can do this on your own, but why should you, if you have me?" He asks, quite reasonably, and Clarke agrees, trying not to giggle with happiness. This doesn't necessarily mean anything, right? If Octavia was a single mother, he'd take her to doctor too. She keeps telling herself that, but Bellamy never leaves her side, holds her hand as they both look at the screen of the monitor, with something grey and unidentifiable showing up, but the sight of her baby makes Clarke ridiculously happy. It's not her life anymore, it's hers and her baby's. It's _them_ now. Bellamy seems happy too: he smiles and kisses her hair, and when the doctor calls him the father, he doesn't correct her. Somewhere at the back of her mind Clarke thinks that maybe it's just so that he doesn't ruin the moment, or maybe that he didn't really pay attention to what the doctor said, but for once, she lets herself believe that maybe he wants to be in this with her. Just maybe.

They go to a cheap burger place to celebrate that night, and they're joined by Octavia, Lincoln, Monty and Jasper. They all seem happy for her, everyone is laughing, and the time they spend there is great. Until a hot waitress starts flirting with Bellamy, and he flirts back. At least that's what Clarke thinks because he smiles at her when she talks and doesn't exactly discourage her attention. The thought that he might be flirting with someone feels like a punch to her guts, and Clarke can't bring herself to smile that night after that. She keeps getting distracted, and Octavia has to say, "Earth to Clarke," before she can get her attention. Not everyone seems to notice her state of mind, but Bellamy and Octavia definitely do. On the way home Bellamy asks her if she's okay and she reassures him, forcing a smile that she hopes looks genuine.

She storms into Octavia's room around midnight because she knows that Bellamy is always in bed by then. O doesn't seem surprised when that happens. She doesn't bother asking if Clarke's alright (already knowing something's up), so she merely asks, "What happened?", and Clarke flops down onto the bed next to her friend.

"I think living here with you and Bellamy was a stupid idea," Clarke states.

O raises her eyebrows, unimpressed. "And why is that?"

"Because I'm a complete idiot, and I love him even more than I ever have, but he literally doesn't care and only flirts with those waitresses. I wouldn't be surprised if he has one-night stands in secret," Clarke crosses her arms in a defensive gesture.

"That's bullshit and you know that," Octavia lies down next to Clarke so that their heads are on the same level. "I swear you two have been dancing around each other for years now. And I'm just here waiting for you to get yourselves together and make a move."

Clarke rises, propping herself on her elbow. "Why would I make a move? He's not interested. He only cares about me because I'm your friend."

Octavia snorts. "I know you're a good girl, straight A's and all, but sometimes you're so stupid."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means that Bellamy loves you and you love him, and maybe if you actually try to tell him how you feel, you'll discover he doesn't care about that waitress or any other girls because he's crazy for you. He's just too dumb to act on it. Or realise that his feelings are mutual."

Clarke falls on her back again, thinking about what Octavia said. Maybe it's time to take a risk. After all, the worst thing that could happen is him telling that he's not interested, but that's where they are right now anyway.

It's decided for her. Time to make a move.

Next morning, it's Saturday, but Clarke is up early since she could barely sleep, worried about her encounter with Bellamy in the nearest future. When it gets to eight in the morning, she knocks on Bellamy's door and pokes her head in. He's awake but in bed, scrolling through his phone. He smiles when he sees her and for some reason doesn't look surprised. Probably because he noticed her mood last night too. Suddenly, Clarke is extremely aware that her pyjama shorts hide almost nothing. And there's a small bump on her stomach that she's been feeling slightly self-conscious about, but she has to deal with it, so.

She sits at the corner of the bed, and Bellamy sits up straighter to look at her carefully. "We need to talk," she starts, and Bellamy frowns, confused.

"Sure," he offers and pats the space next to him. She moves close, and rests her head on his shoulder, which he accepts without question and kisses her hair. As always, that makes her heart stumble over a beat and then speed up. "Are you alright?" he asks, and Clarke gets a weird calm feeling. She's ready to take a risk, and with Bellamy it's worth it.

She raises her head and turns to face him. He's frowning, his brows knit together, and she touches that spot, trying to smooth the skin out. Then she palms his cheek and leans in to kiss him. It's soft and innocent, but she stays there for a few moments, and when she pulls away his eyes are closed, like he can't believe that just happened.

"I love you," she says and tries not to feel scared as he freezes for a while, not saying anything, just looking her in the eye with a strange expression. Just as she's about to turn around and leave, upset, he pulls her in and kisses her, firm and wet and hot, and she melts into his touch. Her heart beats so fast it threatens to break out of her chest, and she loses any coherent thought she could've had. When they part, she is in Bellamy's lap, and she has no idea how she got there.

"I love you, too," he says with a smile so bright she thinks it might blind her.

"Despite me being pregnant?" Clarke asks, as if Bellamy's forgotten that fact.

He looks down and places a hand to her belly, which sends a wave of shock (but of pleasant kind) through her body. "Regardless," he murmurs softly. "I want all of it, Clarke. Everything that comes with you, and the baby too."

"And you're not going to flirt with waitresses?" she tries to make it sound like a joke, but Bellamy's expression changes.

"That's why you were upset," he says, and Clarke looks away. "I wasn't flirting with her, Princess. I was happy and didn't want to be rude. I'm not interested in anyone but you."

She leans in to kiss him again, and this time the kiss is hungry and desperate, like he's been waiting for this to happen for a long time. And maybe he actually has, and just the thought of that fills Clarke with an immense amount of happiness. She gets braver and reaches to tug his shirt off, making him laugh softly when she struggles because of the weird position she is in. They part for a moment so that she can straddle him, feeling his erection press into her. She hastily pulls her tank top off, and Bellamy helps her, and she's not wearing a bra so he kneads on her breast, and that makes her hiss.

"Sorry," Bellamy says, slightly panicked, but Clarke giggles.

"Just be careful, okay? I’m pregnant, after all."

This time he goes softer, and the feel of his hand on her breast makes Clarke tilt her head back and roll her hips, rocking into his erection. That sends waves of pleasure through her body, but that's not nearly enough. She moans desperately.

Bellamy chuckles at that and turns them over so that he's on top of her. He puts his leg in between hers and Clarke grinds into his thigh, unable to help herself, while Bellamy continues kissing her and massaging her breast, pinching her nipple slightly, and that makes her gasp. Pretty soon she's completely naked underneath him, and Bellamy's fingers find her clit, rubbing it, and it takes Clarke a lot of effort not to lift her hips constantly, even though they seem to move without her control anymore. He keeps working her up until her release comes and Clarke has to push his hand away because it's just _too much_.

She lays on his pillow, breathing heavily and coming back to senses while he watches her all the time with a smile on his face. He looks so smug that Clarke shoves his shoulder, "Shut up," but can't stop herself from giggling after that.

Bellamy pulls the covers over both of them and pulls her to his chest, warm and cuddly, but also very strong. "What about you?" Clarke asks, frowning, but Bellamy shakes his head and kisses her temple. "This time was for you, Princess."

As much as Clarke wants to insist, she accepts it and lets out a content sigh. "Have I told you that I love you?" she murmurs into his neck.

"Not enough," he states, and Clarke giggles.

"I'll have to do better, then," she says and kisses his throat. She can't remember being quite this happy.

When Octavia comes downstairs around ten o'clock, Clarke is at the kitchen table, reading a book and eating a banana with nutella - something she's been craving a lot lately. Bellamy isn't there: he's gone to the store to stock up on groceries.

Octavia looks at Clarke with suspicion. "You know, next time you and Bell decide to… _spend some time together_ ," she emphasises the last words, making Clarke blush, "could you try and be a little more quiet? I don't want to know anything about my brother's sex life."

Clarke swallows her food. "Sorry," she says and shrugs sheepishly, though unable to hide a smile.

O rolls her eyes and suddenly lets out a happy squeal and hugs Clarke. "I'm so happy for you idiots!"

"Thank you?" Clarke asks, rolling her eyes too.

"But seriously," she says, pulling away, "you two better keep quiet or I'll move into Lincoln's place."

"Why haven't you?"

"Ouch," Octavia pretends to be offended.

Clarke giggles. "Has he asked?" and wiggles her eyebrows.

"Maybe," fake-shy says O, but then lets out another happy squeal. "He has, two weeks ago actually. And now that Bellamy is completely occupied with you I hope his reaction to the news is not going to be _too_ painful."

"Happy to be of use, I guess," Clarke shrugs with a smile.

"You are the best thing that happened to my brother, I hope you realise that."

"I do."

Clarke is on her sixth's month of pregnancy when she gets a call from the person she least expected to ever want to talk to her. "Raven?" she says into her phone, baffled.

"Hey, Clarke," her friend responds, quiet and slightly hesitant. "Would you like to meet? I feel like we need to talk."

If Clarke was eating something, she would've choked. "Sure," she says, "definitely. When are you free?"

"I can do tonight? Around eight?"

"Same bar?"

"Always. See you there, Clarke," Raven says and hangs up, and Clarke stands there for a few more moments, staring at her phone in awe.

Clarke shows up a little earlier, having turned down Bellamy's offer to stay with her but having allowed him to drive her there. She's nervous because she has no idea what Raven has to say. Maybe she hates her even more now and wants to wish her to die? But Raven wouldn't do that, right?

Raven comes in, looking as gorgeous as always, wearing a lot of makeup - something she stopped doing right after Finn's death. But she does look more like herself now. She doesn't smile at Clarke, but she doesn't scowl either, so that fill her with hope. Maybe she's been forgiven.

"Hey," Clarke says, unable to bear the silence any longer. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I've been a lot better," she nods towards Clarke's stomach. "See you've kept the baby."

"I have."

"Do you regret it?"

"No."

There is heavy silence for a few moments, but then Raven sighs. "Look, I know I said I never wanted to talk to you again and that I hated you… But I don't." Clarke smiles to that. "I just hope that you know I didn't actually mean it. I would never hate you, you're one of my closest friends, and I… I miss you, Clarke. I've known Finn my whole life, and when he died, I sort of didn't know who I was anymore. And then you said you were carrying his baby. And I know you'd never do something like that on purpose. You wouldn't do that to me. And it's not like Finn and I were working out anyway, it was all approaching a big breakup. So… I'm sorry about the things I said and for ignoring you all this time. I'd like to be in your life again, if you don't mind?"

Clarke is definitely taken aback by Raven's words for a moment because she wouldn't forgive herself, and Raven is the best person in the world for being so kind and open. She realises she hasn't said anything because panic shows on Raven's face, and so Clarke smiles. "I missed you too."

Raven sighs with relief. "Thank God. I thought you'd never forgive me," she moves to sit next to Clarke and to hug her. They both giggle. "Tell me everything that happened in last five months."

Clarke smiles. "Well, Bellamy and I are together now, and I actually live with him."

"Bellamy?" Raven raises her eyebrows. "As in Octavia's hot brother Bellamy who adores you but you always said you hated him?"

"How did you know he adored me?"

"You had to be blind not to notice," Raven shrugs. "And what, he's okay with you being pregnant with another guy's kid?"

"He's actually really excited to be a dad."

"Damn. He must really love you, then. I swear you always come out of troubles smelling like a rose," she shakes her head, and Clarke chuckles. "Do you know the baby's gender? If you don't mind telling," she adds quickly.

"It's a girl," Clarke says, pressing a hand to her stomach. "Do you want to feel her kick?"

"Sure," Raven says, seeming a little weirded out, but when the baby kicks at her hand a big smile appears on her face. "This is amazing. She's so active. You'll have to make sure she does dancing or something when she grows up. She's got a lot of energy."

Clarke laughs. "I missed you so much," she says sincerely, and they hug again.

Daisy is born on Christmas Eve, and she's the cutest and tiniest and most precious baby Clarke has ever seen. The second she takes her into her embrace her heart explodes with love so powerful that it gets hard to breathe. She'd take a bullet for her daughter.

Her mother comes to visit her at the hospital, even though they've never reconciled, but she had driven three hours just to take a look at Clarke and her daughter, and that makes Clarke's heart melt a little. She knows her relationship with her mother will never be perfect, but now she knows that she's willing to try.

Bellamy holds her and won't let go of her for good ten minutes, until Octavia has to ask Clarke to force him to let others hold Daisy. Bellamy rolls his eyes and gives his daughter to Octavia, who coos at the baby and introduces herself as her aunt Octavia. She giggles when Daisy grabs her forefinger. Lincoln is there too, and he smiles at O, making Clarke think that maybe soon she will be the one meeting her niece or nephew. Raven comes in later, having rushed to the hospital as soon as she could, and when she sits next to Clarke and holds Daisy, everyone can see tears in her eyes. 

"Hi," she says to the baby. "You are beautiful, aren't you? I'm Raven, and I love you," Daisy grabs her finger in response to that, and Raven sniffs. "Your mom and I had a rough patch, but we're good now, so I hope I'm allowed to see you often." 

"Of course you are," Clarke says. "You're family."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you leave some comments :)

**Author's Note:**

> Still a new girl here, leave some love in the comment please!
> 
> Also, come find me on [tumblr](http://roseannedarcy.tumblr.com), and let's be friends!


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